So why are you looking for peace? Why are you looking for freedom indiscriminate? Why do you want to escape what you call anxiety? Why do you think that certain practices are important? Because you have not seen it? Maybe you just have not seen it yet.
The attitude with which you seek determines how close you get. You hope that if you do this and that just a bit better and more disciplined you will get your reward. But the obstacles in your way, the conditions you want to satisfy, and the phenomena upon which you make it contingent are a direct expression of your state of being. When you transform your state you will get it, no obstacles, no rewards, no conditions, and no subclauses.
Why is there no reward? Because a reward implies an obstacle and overcoming it the appeasement of some higher authority that stands in between the broken you and the vast you. As long as you are looking for the approval of another to reach it, all you’ll find behind your eventual success is the problem you tried to solve. You are the ultimate reward, but we are not going to call it that. Because once you do you lose it.
It’s just like in those old computer games where you could travel beyond the right end of the screen to reappear on the other, only that you are standing right on the boundary in eternal pursuit of that something that will always be as far away from you as you are from yourself.
Our mind is an illusionist par excellence. One of its tricks is scrambling time. Like making you believe that the problem actually preceded the solution. But what if the solution actually preceded the problem? You see, the vessel is the obstacle and your very attempt of salvation is your damnation!